Post by Wraith on Jan 13, 2008 19:11:12 GMT -5
This should be in the non-Eq fanfiction index.
This is a humorous parody of bad out-of-character pairing fanfiction applied to the John Woo classic "Hard-Boiled" The composition is intentionally bad.
Alan looked at himself in the mirror. Behind himself he saw Mad Dog sitting on the bed. “Does Johnny Wong know were we are? asked Mad Dog looking out to the the motel parking lot running his hand nervously through his flowing raven locks.” “No said Alan, we are all alone here.”
“He makes me do things I don’t like.” Said Mad Dog “He makes me hurt people and kill puppies and shit. I really don’t like doing what I do”
Mad Dog started to cry. Alan started to get sad because of this. “Don’t cry” he said.
The tears streamed down Mad Dog’s face like a river. He took up a sheet from the bed and wiped his face with it. Alan wanted to put a stop to this crying like the Dutch boy. He putt his arms around him and said It’ll be ok, I won’t ever make you do anything like that. “I want to look you in the eyes” said Alan, “both of them.” “No,” said Mad Dog, feeling his temporary eye patch, “I can’t take it off” “It’s ok, I wont hurt you” said Alan, taking “the patch off gently. There. It doesn’t look so bad.” Mad Dog smiled sadly as they looked into each other’s eyes, seeing each other’s souls through them.
Alan kissed Mad Dog. Mad Dog’s anxiety seemed to melt away as he embraced his lover. He had never felt as happy as he was while he kissed Alan. He always felt a sense of loyalty to his boss, and his personal code of honor led him to despise traitors. This made him do some brutal things for Johnny Wong and he was seen as a very violent person. Ironically, Alan, this man who betrayed his old boss, saw him as a real person when no one else did.
Alan felt calm as he had never had before he became an undercover cop. He had always wanted to help the innocent by being a cop, but the only way he could be a cop was to work as an undercover cop with triad gangs like Johnny Wong’s gang. Especially when he had to kill his fatherly Uncle Hoi to get be a mole against Johnny Wong. He had to do so many things that felt wrong to help bring Wong down, and he always struggled with himself, but being with Mad Dog didn’t feel wrong. It felt right…
“I have to tell him” Alan thought to himself “I need to tell him I’m really a cop…but how will he react? Will he still love me.” Alan knew he had to be truthful and tell Mad Dog his secret.
Instead, he made a little Origami dog for Mad Dog. “It’s the most beautiful gift anyone’s ever given to me” he said crying. Alan smiled and turned the light off.
Alan and Mad Dog woke up the next morning and lovingly embraced each other’s bodies.
“Your twice the man Tequila is. Said” Alan.
“And your 3 times the man Foxy is,” said Mad Dog.
This is a humorous parody of bad out-of-character pairing fanfiction applied to the John Woo classic "Hard-Boiled" The composition is intentionally bad.
Alan looked at himself in the mirror. Behind himself he saw Mad Dog sitting on the bed. “Does Johnny Wong know were we are? asked Mad Dog looking out to the the motel parking lot running his hand nervously through his flowing raven locks.” “No said Alan, we are all alone here.”
“He makes me do things I don’t like.” Said Mad Dog “He makes me hurt people and kill puppies and shit. I really don’t like doing what I do”
Mad Dog started to cry. Alan started to get sad because of this. “Don’t cry” he said.
The tears streamed down Mad Dog’s face like a river. He took up a sheet from the bed and wiped his face with it. Alan wanted to put a stop to this crying like the Dutch boy. He putt his arms around him and said It’ll be ok, I won’t ever make you do anything like that. “I want to look you in the eyes” said Alan, “both of them.” “No,” said Mad Dog, feeling his temporary eye patch, “I can’t take it off” “It’s ok, I wont hurt you” said Alan, taking “the patch off gently. There. It doesn’t look so bad.” Mad Dog smiled sadly as they looked into each other’s eyes, seeing each other’s souls through them.
Alan kissed Mad Dog. Mad Dog’s anxiety seemed to melt away as he embraced his lover. He had never felt as happy as he was while he kissed Alan. He always felt a sense of loyalty to his boss, and his personal code of honor led him to despise traitors. This made him do some brutal things for Johnny Wong and he was seen as a very violent person. Ironically, Alan, this man who betrayed his old boss, saw him as a real person when no one else did.
Alan felt calm as he had never had before he became an undercover cop. He had always wanted to help the innocent by being a cop, but the only way he could be a cop was to work as an undercover cop with triad gangs like Johnny Wong’s gang. Especially when he had to kill his fatherly Uncle Hoi to get be a mole against Johnny Wong. He had to do so many things that felt wrong to help bring Wong down, and he always struggled with himself, but being with Mad Dog didn’t feel wrong. It felt right…
“I have to tell him” Alan thought to himself “I need to tell him I’m really a cop…but how will he react? Will he still love me.” Alan knew he had to be truthful and tell Mad Dog his secret.
Instead, he made a little Origami dog for Mad Dog. “It’s the most beautiful gift anyone’s ever given to me” he said crying. Alan smiled and turned the light off.
Alan and Mad Dog woke up the next morning and lovingly embraced each other’s bodies.
“Your twice the man Tequila is. Said” Alan.
“And your 3 times the man Foxy is,” said Mad Dog.
